from: xxx7799@gmail.com
to: Transcend Admissions Consultants <transcendadmissions@gmail.com>
date: Sat, Mar 31, 2012 at 1:14 PM
subject: The Second Time was the Charm!
mailed-by: gmail.com
Dear David,
I want to give you a quick summary of my results and to say thanks!
I was interviewed by the UC Berkeley (Haas) UT-Austin, and Michigan (Ross) MBA programs and have already received offers of admission from UT-Austin and Michigan with a generous scholarship!
I want to thank you for the strong support you provided to me during the application process. When I applied last year, and again this year, I thought that I needed to use the essays to tell an amazing story, and highlight every single accomplishment and key skill that I have in order to stand out. I think the problem was that I was trying to say too many different things while crafting a unique and interesting story and I struggled to market my most important selling points.
I truly appreciate the efforts you spent in ripping my essays apart (many times), and helping me to create simple and clear essays that contained persuasive statements about my motivations, important qualities, ambitions and why I needed an MBA. I realize now that I didn’t have to try so hard to stand out – but just needed to respond to the essay questions in a thoughtful and direct way and paint a complete picture of myself. You really simplified the writing process for me, and the results, well, they speak for themselves!
Thanks again,
A. Lee